Archive | May, 2013

Letter from the state Senator!

31 May

Yesterday I received a letter from Eric Abetz, the Liberal Senator for Tasmania. It’s not often you get a letter with Australia’s coat of arms on it so at first it had me a little worried. I was delighted to see that it wasn’t anything bad. It was a letter to congratulate me on the release of my book. It was really nice thing to get so I thought I would share it because it’s not often something like that happens. 😀

Thanks Mr Abetz that was a lovley gesture.


From me to you

28 May

So the publisher gave me a sample of the Ebook version of Into the Night to give you all. Below is the link for all you out there in web land. Download, read, share and Enjoy!

The first three chapter are available as a ‘look inside’ on kindle as well if you want more for free!

Enjoy guys!

Ryder’s Story: Chapter six

28 May

Chapter six


The bodies of my wife and children lay bloodied and lifeless on the floor. I dropped the lantern and fell to my knees; scrambling to Annabelle’s body. I shook her, silently begging for her to wake. Tears burned my eyes, as I clutched my blood covered child to my chest. The word ‘no’ escaped my lips in a chanted prayer, over and over.  I thought it had to be a dream; I must have fallen from my horse on the trip home and knocked myself unconscious.  But as the cold blood soaked through to my skin I knew it was no dream. I gathered the three bodies and held them all; unable to do anything else and cried.


“I am sorry brother,” said a voice from the darkness; I jumped and scooted away wide eyed. That voice, I knew that voice. The over turned lantern cast a flickering light around the door but the corner the voice came from was still shadowed.  My entire body shook with fear as I tried to convince myself that I must have been mistaken, it couldn’t be who I thought it was. A figure stood from the table, moving to kneel beside me. A hand fell on my shoulder and I looked up into the deep brown eyes I knew so well. They were different now, colder, brighter, and older but the face had not aged a day. There kneeling beside me was Dashiell, my brother.


“I did not wish for this to happen brother, I was not quick enough to stop it,” my mind could not comprehend what I was seeing and I thought surely he must be a ghost. He put his arms around me and in my grief I let him. He still looked like the nineteen year old boy, who had once been my big brother, my best friend and even though thirteen years had passed since I had last seen him alive, right in that moment I felt like I was eighteen again and he was there for me when I needed him, just as he always had. I broke down unable to process my loss and the presence of my long lost brother.


“We do not have long, it will soon be morning,” warned another voice from my past. Somehow my hand found my sword and I jumped to my feet pushing Dashiell behind me, aiming the point of the sword toward the beast that strolled through the door.


“How did you get in here!?”I growled, staring at the blood covered monster. He’d done this, it wasn’t enough that he took everything from me once, no he had returned to finish the job.

“Your lovely wife invited us in. She was a very gracious host,” I tightened my grip on my sword.


“Get out of here Dash, I’ll hold him off,” I called to my brother, but he sighed sadly; the beast on the other hand laughed.


“Did you hear that Dashiell. He plans to hold me off, foolish mortal.” I glanced at Dashiell but only for a second, and cursed my own foolishness. That was not my brother, at least not anymore, he was a monster and now I was stuck between the two of them.


“I am sorry brother; you must trust that everything will be ok. I promise,” the creature moved before I had a chance to figure out where to. There was a loud crack and my head was thrown to the side. Pain, sharp and hot ran through me for only a second then I felt my body crumple to the ground as everything went dark.


I’m not sure how but I knew I wasn’t dead, not truly; more in a state of suspended animation I guess. I couldn’t move, I couldn’t think, I couldn’t breathe, for a while there was just nothing; dark terrifying nothing, then there was pain. It was like no other pain I had experienced in my life, white and hot it burned through every cell in my body. I could feel each and every one as they died and changed into something they were never meant to be. Corrupted to function like they had never been intended to function. I wanted to scream, I wanted to yell and cry out in pain. I wanted to claw my own skin off to escape the burning that ran through me. I couldn’t move, it was as though I had forgotten how, like my brain and my body were not connected the way they should have been anymore. It felt like years I was prisoner inside my own body, but it was truly only days. Finally the pain stopped and all I could feel was the slow beating of my heart. Slowly it stopped, the final beat sending another wave of blinding pain through me; followed by sweet release.


My eyes slowly opened like I was awaking from a deep sleep, it was dark and something cool and damp fell into them, but it did not hurt. I tried to blink away whatever it was but couldn’t. I tried to move my hands to rub my eyes but they were held in place by the cool, damp substance. I wriggled my fingers to see if I could recall the feeling; I did, it was damp, soft, dirt, I had been buried alive! Panicking I screamed, my mouth and lungs filling with dirt, but again it wasn’t painful, I didn’t cough and I soon realised that I didn’t even need to breathe.  I dug at the loosened dirt; I could hear muffled voices above me as I fought my way to the surface. As I broke through into the dark night a hand reached down and pulled me free with incredible strength. I collapsed to my knees coughing up dirt by the lung full but it didn’t like I had expected it to, nothing had. I blinked the dirt from my eyes and wiped at my face. I felt strange like I wasn’t really in my own skin.  I stared at my hands; they were still long fingered and strong as they always had been. However they were now un-callused, unscarred and bone white. Every muscle in my body hummed with a strength I had never possessed. I felt strong, vibrant, I would say alive but I was smart enough to know I wasn’t, not truly.  I looked over to Dashiell who was leaning on a shovel.  His hands, clothes and face dirty. Skyler on the other hand sat on a tombstone not a speck of dirt on him. The blood that had covered him before, my family’s blood was gone. At that thought I felt a twinge of pain, it wasn’t at all the mind numbing pain, the heart ache I had before.  This was numb and all it did was make me mad, really mad. Before I’d even thought to move I was on my feet. I stood in a fighting stance that felt both unnatural and natural all at once. A growl that rumbled through my chest was so inhuman it shocked me. A sharp pain bit into my bottom lip as my jaw ached and my fangs elongated.  I felt wild, savage, uncontrolled but free. The thought of using my bare hands to rip the vampire to pieces excited me in a way violence never had before.


“Easy there brother, that is my sire you are growling at,”


“He killed my family!” I snapped my voice lisped because I could not quite talk with the fangs I now had.


“He regrets it,” Dashiell said in a small sad voice. It was almost like he was sorry that it had happened. “Neither of us wanted for that to happen. But, she attacked Skyler, he was merely defending himself,” a dry laugh escaped my throat. In the back of my mind I could feel the pain from my loss, but my mind pushed it back so I would not have to deal with it. Somehow I knew I would rather focus on revenge than face the fact I would never see my girls again. Girls I loved, girls who I cherished, girls who I had raised with my bare hands, girls that were now dead.


“So that makes it alright, is this what you do now Dash? Murder women and children because they stand in your way. You are a monster, you both are and I will end the two of you if it takes my last breath!” I growled and the prick had the nerve to look hurt, but the look passed quickly.


“You are just hurt and mad brother, you will come to see that everything will work out for the best. We are brothers again and will be forever. We will not grow old and die, we will not get sick, we are immortal and now we are together,” he said in a voice that only the riotous or the insane could manage. The Dashiell I had known had not been either, but this one I wasn’t sure of.


“No, brother,” I spat the word as if it was sour in my mouth and fixed him with a look a pure hatred. “What we are, is damned and by the grace of go…” it was all I could say, the word burned my mouth. The two vampires laughed at my torment.


“By the grace of god brother?” he asked in an amused voice. “God holds no grace for you, not anymore. Your Faith in him will be your undoing Ryder, it is a weakness I do not share. But you always had more faith than me,” I felt myself lunge toward Skyler I was sick of talking it was time to act.

“Enough Ryder, you will calm down and you will obey,”

I skidded to a stop at the sound of Dashiell’s voice. It was almost like he was in my head. It rattled my bones, shook me to my foundation and I stopped as he asked.


I wanted to turn all the anger I felt welling up inside on him. Tell him to go to hell where he belonged and take that beast with him but I couldn’t. Neither my body nor my mind would do as I asked it to. Instead it listened to Dashiell like he was he was the bringer of life himself. My anger drained away and an unnatural sense of calm washed over me. I knew why I had wanted to kill them both, but I just didn’t want it anymore. I nodded toward Dashiell. I fought to shake the feeling from myself, knowing I was being controlled by some demon mind trick. I clenched my fists and glared at him. Though I could do little more than that I wanted him to know that he would not control me.  As I stared at the man who had once been my brother I knew there must be a way to break the hold he had over me.


“I will not obey,” I spat through gritted teeth. Skyler laughed and Dashiell shook his head.


“Your prodigy has a strong will, I have not seen a will like his in a long time,” Skyler said getting to his feet. He walked over and stood with Dashiell. They both studied me like I was a prized animal on display.


“Alas Ryder always was stubborn and bull headed. He’ll come around eventually when he has realised what a gift he has received.” He turned his gaze to me, “now come Ryder, you need to feed,”


It was months before I was myself again. Before I was allowed to stop and just reflect on everything thing I had done. Dashiell had released me from compulsion because I had stopped fighting it. In all truth I had stopped wanting to. I was happier when I didn’t care; I was not weighed down by what was right and what was wrong. I did what felt good. The three of us moved from village to village causing panic and chaos wherever we went. Though void of anything resembling human emotion, no one at the time was ever killed by my hand, not that I would have lost much sleep over the fact if I had. I’d killed men in my life; more had died by more sword for gold than I care to admit and that was when I was alive. But I’d watched countless murders, just stood and watched as people died. Skyler was smart; he’d never kill a person he’d drained. He’d compel them and patch them up. Skyler killed for the thrill of it neither Dashiell or I had done a thing to stop him. It was easy to see by watching the way they worked how they had gone undetected for so long. I like to think this was Skyler’s greatest mistake. He’d let me live and because of that I knew him better than any hunter ever had.


This revelation came to me in a fit of rage, in London’s dark and sordid streets.  I walked alone, a stupid thing to do at night in London, but I had nothing to fear. A mugger would serve as a welcome meal choice and hunter would be a welcome end to it all. I was well dressed for a man in these parts of London; Dashiell said it made us look like easy prey. I cared little for that at the time; I only cared how far I could get from my sire and his before I was again drawn back to them.  Though I knew even if I made it out of London completely I would have no choice but to return if he called.


“Care for a bit, love,” asked a woman who grabbed my arm as I passed. I glared at her as I shook her off. She was little more than another worthless victim for the plague to take, not even worth the time it would take to pity her.  I continued walking. My throat burned but I was content to ignore it, I doubted Dashiell would let me starve and I’d rather it be on his conscience than mine. London was a lot smaller then than it is now and the city itself was surrounded by fields and farmlands. Streets were just spaces between houses and shops and all the roads were dirt.  Though it did not see the kind of devastation it would almost two hundred years later; London was still one of the best places in all of England for vampires. In fact there were many of us in such a small area.  I stopped at one of the city gates and leaned against the wall. I had not let the reality of what had happened to me really sink in yet and I never planned to. I figured I’d never be ready to face my past so I merely didn’t.  It was much easier that way. I had lingering moments of regret but as soon as the pain set in I pushed it all away. Dashiell made it simple for me to do so, so in a way he’d done me a kindness after all the pain he had caused.  I watched as two ratty children walked along the road toward me. Their clothes were torn, they were clearly orphaned and both were young girls. The pair held hands and I could hear their conversation much before I should have been able to. The eldest of the two saw me first and hope shone in her young eyes. I watched a frown on my face as they approached. You’d think after my own up brining I of all people would have had a soft spot for the two girls but sadly I was indifferent.


“Evening sir, can you spare some coin?” asked the eldest as they stopped in from of me. The words ‘sod off street rats’ died on my tongue before they even had a chance to leave. I looked between the dirty blonde haired girls and saw faces I didn’t even want to imagine. I felt my legs weaken and my eyes widen as their clothes changed from ratty rags to pretty pink, white and blue sun dresses. Suddenly standing before me weren’t the two down on their luck orphans, but my girls. I rubbed my eyes, but the memory would not fade. My shaking knees gave out and I dropped to the ground studying the two girls.


“Are you alright father?” Asked Maryanne


“Maryanne? Annabelle? My girls?” pain erupted in my chest as I remembered the last time I’d see them alive. The two of them had run to me scared looking for protection and I’d failed them. It was like something in my mind snapped and I was flooded with things I just hadn’t wanted to think about over the last few weeks. But what I remembered the most was the blood.

“You’re dead, No, no, you can’t be, I… I’m so sorry babies, I let you down. You died because I wasn’t there, I failed you.” My voice broke and the girls backed away.


“We’re not dead mister,” Maryanne said and I pulled the two girls into me and held them tight.


“I’ve missed you both so much, you don’t need to worry, we’ll be fine. I’ll take care of you; I won’t let anything hurt you this time. I’m so sorry girls, I’m sorry,” blood stained tears rolled down my cheeks as memories flooded my head alarmingly fast. I couldn’t process them all, I couldn’t sort the happiness from the pain, nor could I decipher the memories from reality. It was like my emotional barricade that I’d built or maybe Dashiell had, had broken down and I was dealing with it all at once. It was intense, painful and most of all it felt real. Part of me believed my girls were alive, that these orphans were them. I knew then what I had to do, I had to make them like me. Then I would never lose them again. We could be a family again, I could have them back. I felt my fangs extend as I thought it through.


“Ryder, what are you doing?” I knew I was sobbing, and I knew how insane I must have looked at the time, but I wasn’t equipped to handle truth so my mind ensured I didn’t have to.


“I found them Dashiell, I found them,” I said he looked down at me, a scowling Skyler at his side.


“I can see that,” he said and for once he sounded worried.


“I’m going to turn them, you’re going to show me how, I want my girls,”


“Oh brother, let go of the children. Consider this for a second my friend, you are going to hurt them,”


“I would never hurt them,” I growled my voice an inhuman rasp.


“Ok, ok, I believe you, but you must let them go now,” he said slowly taking a step forward. I heard my girl’s soft cries, and I held them closer, away from him. They were scared of him, he’d hurt them, I wouldn’t let it happen again.


“Stay back!” I growled my voice a clear warning.


“Control him Dashiell,” said Skyler.


“I’m trying it’s not working, there is something wrong,”


“I warned you Dashiell, I knew this would happen. You tampered with his mind, to spare him pain, now the compulsion has worn off and he cannot cope with it. It is an amateur mistake Dashiell, one that usually involves more killing, less kidnapping and crying. Fix it, or kill him either way, we must get him off the street he’ll expose us all.”


“Ryder look at me, those are not you’re girls, your girls are dead.” Images of blood, bodies, sweet lifeless faces flashed in my mind. No!


“Lies!” I growled,


“Snap out of it brother and look at them! They are not Maryanne and Annabelle; they are street rats, like we once were. Look at them Ryder,” the order echoed through my head and I held the girls at arm’s length. The image of my beautiful girls faded, and two wide eyed, terrified strangers stared back at me. They were both crying and begging me not to hurt them. Shocked I stumbled backwards away from them and Skyler quickly swooped in on the girls.


“Please do not hurt them,” said Dashiell as he made his way toward me. All the sounds around me faded when I realised what I had been planning to do. I would have killed those girls had Dashiell not shown up when he had, because of some pain filled delusion I would have condemned them both to a life I hated. My body shook as I huddled into myself my fangs tearing into my lip. The feel of them was the only thing keeping me anchored.


“Brother, you have to accept that the life you once had is dead.  You are no longer a Lord, no longer a father, a husband or a knight. You are a vampire, we are all the family you have and if you want to survive you have to accept that. I didn’t and it is the reason we are both here. Getting them back will not make the pain go away, even if it were possible. I thought having you back would fix my pain brother, but you hate me,” he said anger broke through my haze of scattered emotions. Anger and cold hatred.


“Because you took my family Dashiell, you had them killed! But not only that you condemned me along with you. How could you have possibly thought I would accept that, that I could accept that? I can’t live like this Dashiell; I won’t lose my mind chasing ghosts!” I snapped and I was on my feet. I pulled the dagger that I had on me, I knew it would be no good against him. It would snap before it broke his skin but I liked the feel of it in my hand. I pointed it at him and he raised his hands in surrender. “I won’t live like this, you can either kill me now, or I’ll kill you and do it myself,” he reached into his jacket so fast even I had barely seen him move. He had a stake in his hand and he took a few steps forward.


“You cannot kill me brother, I made you. I gave you your new life. We are bonded now, you and I, we are blood now.” I kept the dagger aimed at him as he continued forward. He pushed the stake into my hand and raised it placing it over his heart.  He stepped forward driving the tip into his skin, he dropped his hand and looked me in the eyes. I’d see those eyes a million times in my life and I’d never seen them filled with so much sadness. But they were still cold, still void of the light that used to make this man my brother. “Do it, go on, stake me. If you can, if you can do it Anthony I’ll let you hack my head right off. I won’t have much of a choice. You want revenge, go on, take it,” I felt my grip tighten on the stake and the dagger fell to the ground.  I put both hands to the stake, and I met his gaze again. He didn’t look afraid, he didn’t even look worried. He just looked sad. I could feel the hurt, anger and sorrow swirling in me, I knew I had to do this. I would never get another chance like it. I summoned up the courage and tried to push the stake forward but it wouldn’t budge. My arms couldn’t find the strength to even get it into his skin. He studied me as I took a cleansing breath and tried to get past in the block in my mind. My hands fell away and the stake clattered to the ground. Every part of me wanted to kill him, wanted to make both of them pay for what they had done to my family, and for what they had done to me. I dropped to my knees and held my head high.


“I need you to end it Dashiell, do me this kindness, you owe me that much,” I exposed my neck, it was the quickest way.


“No, you will not die tonight Ryder and I forbid you from ending your own life. You may die but it will not be from your own hand,” he said. His voice was calm and the order pounded into my very soul.  I’d broken his compulsion once tonight but wasn’t so sure I could do it again, but I wanted to. I hated him for denying me what I needed.  Anger boiled within me and I wanted to kill him, I wanted him to suffer as I was suffering.


“I hate you, more than you will ever know. You are not and you will never be my brother, monster. I never wanted this and he would never force it on to me,” I snapped and his glare became cold.


“You think I wanted this Anthony! Huh? Do you really think I went to the stables that night with this in mind? We both went there for the same reason but only you left alive! I did this for you. He was taking Elizabeth, I took her place. He said he’d let you both live if I agreed to this. I did it for you brother. You might have claimed otherwise but I knew you loved her. I let myself be turned into this so you could live. You got to become a man Anthony; you had a life, a wife, children and a home. I never got any of that. Do you really think I would have chosen this for myself? I wanted what you had, but I will never get that chance brother. You are all the family I ever had, so can you blame me for wanting it back?  You can hate me all you want brother but I did all this for you!”  I didn’t know how to respond to that. His hands were shaking with anger. I’d never considered his motives before. Neither of us had wanted this and the true evil behind it all was watching amused from the sidelines. Neither of us spoke and finally Dashiell walked off. Leaving me on my knees.


“Come little vampire, we’re leaving” said Skyler before he followed Dashiell. I watched after them and did the only thing I could think enough to do, I followed.


Just a little thanks :)

27 May

Today i decided to take the time to thank some one who really deserves it. That person is my best friend Lauren. She has been amazing over the time it took to get Into the Night into book form and all ready for everyone out there and she is still being amazing with her help on Ryder’s Story. i think i have thanked her a million times but sometimes it never hurts to put it in writing. The two of us endured 3 am editing sessions when i had a huge deadline and she was always willing to read every single thing i shoved at her. Without her most of the posts were be a full of crazy mistakes that i didn’t even notice. She does pretty much all my editing and is always willing to have new ideas bounced off of her. She know my characters probably just as well as i do and i don’t think i would ever be able to get over the dreaded writers block without her there to talk me through it. So Lauren if you do read this thank you and i really hope my constant bugging you, doesn’t annoy to much 🙂


I want to give another thanks to all the readers out there. Thank you all for taking the time to have a look around and i will be putting up some more interesting stuff soon.

Time Zone Time Travel

23 May

So, as the post suggests i want to talk a little about times zones. Of course seeing I know nothing really scientific on the topic it won’t be all that informative, it was just something i found cool, in a way, i guess.


So today I had to wake up at 4am in the morning to attend a webinar, (which for all that don’t know is like a seminar except online) that my publisher was hosting. This  webinar  was meant to happen at 2pm  on the twenty second of may. For me of course, it happened at 4am, on the twenty third.  So while most people who attended were sitting in their office, or house or where ever, here i was (totally in the future btw) snuggled in my bed still in my PJ’s at 4 am trying to concentrate. So i’m not saying it’s logical and i’m not even saying it a real thing (because it is crazy o’clock while i was posting this, and i might have a wicked case of the tired crazies) but time travel is possible and apparently you can do it in your PJ’s.


Ok well i’m going back to bed,


Sighing off from the future, 😛